Monday, December 28, 2009


Ariel is one of my dearest friends from college. We spoke last night after far, far too long. I sometimes get into ruts where I think constantly of the people I love but that affection in no way translates to picking up the phone. Not sure what I am doing with my time that makes it so impossible to call but suddenly it becomes almost insurmountable. Ridiculous isn't it? Then I sound utterly absurd protesting later "But I have been thinking about you so much!" when there is absolutely no proof of that whatsoever.

Anyway we spoke yesterday and it was heaven. She said exactly the right thing at the right time. Isn't it lovely when people do that? Conversely it profoundly unlovely when people say the exact wrong thing at the wrong time. Random lady in line at the bookstore on Christmas Eve: "Oh thirty-five? Mmm so you do not want kids?" No bueno.

People who have known you for ages and are familiar with the many different you-s that you have been along the way have a unique perspective. Someone who can remember when you wore Doc Martens and wanted to be an archaeologist--that person really understands how funny and twisty the road has been.

There is a wonderful simplicity and lack of having to explain why something is important when you speak to those people. And there is a tremendous sense that whatever you are going to do in your life--you will do it together. Last year when I told my friend Amber that I was about to start querying agents, she asked me "When do we start?" The "we" is the greatest gift a friend can give you.

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  1. priya! if i had a running blog that was NOT about the bore-you-to-sleep details of growing vegetables (which, yes, i do...) but more about chronicling my daily trials and triumphs, i would have had an entry yesterday that said, essentially, what you said here. it was more than inspiring, and just as gloriously familiar to talk with you yesterday. how could you possibly have been right where my mind was at that instant i called?! and yet, as you pointed out, that is what happens when good friends talk, no matter how much time has passed! i finally HAD to call after i had a "call priya!!!" note in my datebook on october 25th!! and before that... six years?? oh my.

  2. Can't remember who told me this... A good friend is someone who bails you out of jail. A GREAT friend is someone who's sitting next to you in the back seat the cop car and says "That was AWESOME!!"

  3. i love that! hope i never get arrested but if i do i hope a close friend is sitting next to me to say just that! xox

    ariel! thank you! that made me so happy! isn't it a supersized version of the 'found a twenty dollar bill in the pocket of my jeans that i just washed three times but the bill is still ok' feeling when friends come zooming back into your life? love it. xoxp


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